Sunday, February 2, 2020

Buddy

BUDDY  2002-2020

Liam lost his cousin Buddy right after the New Year. Buddy was put to his final sleep at his home on Sunday January 5, 2020. Buddy and Liam have lived in the world concurrently for 13 years. Liam entered this world in 2007. They never physically met but they did know each other through the yearly Christmas card exchange and the doggie smells carried back and forth between Liz, Erik, Paul and me. Our dogs know when you have been with another. I showed Liam photos. Liam felt Buddy and he were part of the Nikol doggie pack.

I told Liam of Buddy's passing. He listened. I showed him photos Liz and Erik posted on FB. I covered Liam with my houndstooth shawl and let him process the news. I read him Liz's post and I include it here for all of you. It follows the photos and is in bold italics.

 From Liz

"It is with such crushing sadness that I share that Buddy (age 17) passed away peacefully at home tonight surrounded by love. He had an amazing send off filled with bacon, chocolate, cheeseburgers, farfalle pasta and ice cream. He sat outside on the porch with us and watched the cars go by, bundled up in warm towels and getting constant affection.


 Funny story about Buddy before he got to me... he was adopted in Germany by a female US soldier who returned home to NJ and couldn’t keep him. I later found her (and spoke to her!) by searching the web using his rabies vaccination records. She had her own web page with pictures of her in a dominatrix getup .  What an interesting start to his life! But more fun was to come....

 I adopted Buddy in 2004 smack in the middle of my chemotherapy. He healed my spirit when no one else could. Together we lived in 6 different towns, in 7 different homes and he was a significant part of my 3 serious relationships. He carried me through both the saddest and  happiest moments of my life.






  
Although he gave Erik Chamberjian a tough time when they first met, Erik quickly became the only dad he could ever remember and he loved him until the very last minute... like he had chosen Buddy for himself (and is now of course a permanent doxie dad with funny wiener shirts). I believe that both of my old fur babies have survived this long mainly because of Erik‘s home-cooked doggie food made every single week since we’ve been married.




 Well... here goes, See you on the other side love of my life. There will never be another you...  a piece of my heart goes with you.

I hope you RAN over that rainbow bridge... leaving 2 paralyzed legs a distant memory. Protect us and visit me in my dreams as often as you can
  Til we meet again my love.

This was the absolutely the hardest moment of my life"
January 5th 2020





I have included some passages from the book by
Thich Nhat Hanh, 
No Death, No Fear
recommended for my reading
by a dear childhood friend

an excerpt
“When you lose a loved one, you suffer. But if you know how to look deeply, you have a chance to realize that his or her nature is truly the nature of no birth, no death. There is manifestation and there is the cessation of manifestation in order to have another manifestation. You have to be very keen and very alert in order to recognize the new manifestations of just one person.”
― Thich Nhat Hanh, No Death, No Fear









BUDDY ON HIS LAST NIGHT SURROUNDED BY HIS TOYS
       



“This body is not me; I am not caught in this body, I am life without boundaries, I have never been born and I have never died. Over there the wide ocean and the sky with many galaxies All manifests from the basis of consciousness. Since beginning less time I have always been free. Birth and death are only a door through which we go in and out. Birth and death are only a game of hide-and-seek. So smile to me and take my hand and wave good-bye. Tomorrow we shall meet again or even before. We shall always be meeting again at the true source, Always meeting again on the myriad paths of life.”
― Thích Nhất Hạnh, No Death, No Fear



Buddy's ashes have returned and the Buddy tribute wall grows. I made a vertical triptych for illustration purposes



 Woof, Woof

Sunday, January 12, 2020

Boy Band

I left them for 2 weeks.  How did they do?
If you look on the cocktail table in the photo below
there are some items
telling a story
tea
hot water bottle
topricin
arnicare 
whats all this?
 I promised an update in my last blog post. It has taken a while to get this to you. Tempus fugit
my mother always said.
yes

here is a refresher on where I went, what I did and what I conquered
https://liamlicks.blogspot.com/2019_11_10_archive.html 

What occurred back home.
Paul hurt his back.  Liam provided support by sitting next to him on the couch.

collage of all sorts of days and positions and boy bonding of the boy band

there seemed to be a lot of laundry
wine on the floor
our housekeeper's cleaning towels dried up
 not washed
stiff and standing upright in the bucket








Liam did nothing wrong I am told
no demand for treats or greenies in the early morning hours
no excessive barking
a calm good boy
i apparently am the protagonist
for
 bad behavior




the first days of my return Liam
stared at me
I think he wanted to make sure I was the same person who left

In some ways I am not

and all those are good ways




in the mind of Liam

a suspicious boy
why does she leave
where does she go
and how should I react when she deigns to drop in on me and daddy

I have to figure it out


at Christmas the two still had their own couches and their own toys 
I am NOT included 
























and Liam wanted his card with this pack
not his parents


I left them for 2 weeks.  How did they do?
They did fine.
Paul's back injury affected life at home because he was sort of incapacitated. 
Otherwise the boys seemed to really like being boys and hanging out
It took Paul a day or two to get used to me being around 
Liam a bit longer



but then he came back
first sneaking up on the side
then yawning as if bored
then plopped the bony head down for long solid rest


 Woof Woof

Sunday, November 10, 2019

In the Heights

Liam took two weeks to come around. I got a lot of looks like this one on the left. He did not care that Mom was on her own Amazing Race in Europe and conquering her fears...well at least managing her fears; after two weeks home Liam snuggled back up...see right photo
15 days
one continent
4 countries
thousands of miles
the iconic closer
 of the Amazing Race 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Amazing_Race_(American_TV_series)


If you don't know what I am talking about or need a refresher, check out the prior blog story which lays it all out for you
I traveled to Europe 
10/2/19-10/16/19


and on my bucket list to handle, conquer, obliterate  
is
my
Acrophobia

and here is a bit of an explanation

Causes of Acrophobia

A fear of heights may stem from our natural fear of falling and being injured. Dwelling on the pain that might be inflicted from a fall from a high place also could contribute to the development of acrophobia. It’s normal for people to have some reluctance about being in high places but for those with acrophobia, the fear is unrealistic and excessive. Acrophobia, like all phobias, appears to be a hyper-reaction of the normal fear response. Some experts believe that this may be a learned response to either a previous fall or to a parent’s nervous reaction to heights.

this sentence from above paragraph
It’s normal for people to have some reluctance about being in high places but for those with acrophobia, the fear is unrealistic and excessive 
Unrealistic and excessive, really?
to feel terror at the edge of the Grand Canyon
or climbing Diamond Head
or the top of the lighthouse in Bermuda

oh no
disagree
because if one falls
 death will surely happen



being on the edge of a cliff with no railing, going down stairs from heights with open views, swinging in rickety cable cars
these type of experiences set me off


Do you have it?
I don't have it full fledged...no fear pf plane travel, of hanging my head over my cruise ship's room balcony drying my hair in every sea we sliced through, sitting up top on ferries and Ferris wheel rides
all okay

another read
to further expand and stretch your brain on acrophobia


the following three photos show the heights managed on the trip

first upper top deck of ship         Corfu top of mountain              Santorini the white village top

and Kefalonia...I kinda took a few steps as is recommended in the acrophobia treatment...feasted on the view...stayed away from others on the tour so as not to be jostled...then sat with back to the beach...I was able to sneak a glance and it was okay...Imagine the girl who could not climb Diamond Head is up here
MYRTOS BEACH, KEFALONIA

I did them all with small steps
focusing on walking
looking ahead
the ultimate challenge would be Dubrovnik, Croatia  where I was to traverse and climb and cling to the City Walls at Kings Landing
Our Croatian guide, Darko, started us off with this quote
“Freedom is not to be sold for all the treasures of the world”
An old Dubrovnik motto

This tour is entitled Game of Thrones... not necessary to have watched to understand what happens here to me
 I thank my friends Carol Hohowski and Jim McGrath for doing this with me. They did not watch GoT yet generously signed up for the tour. As they say in the north “the lone wolf dies but the pack survives” and I did survive today because of my pack

As I climb to the top of the tower, I keep repeating GoT sayings for strength and comfort

What do you say to the god of death, Not Today”


“I drink and I know things” 
I know a lot 


“Dracarys”  dragonfire
Mother  of Dragons
explained in prior post

see link below
https://liamlicks.blogspot.com/2019_08_25_archive.html


This was a supreme chilling sublime terror-filled magical experience of climbing and descending

bent the knee a few times
recovered and continued 

I channel Cersei when clueless tour members brush close to me...I hold up my hand to warn them away...I have the wall...it is mine to hug and use to steady myself...no one is getting between me and the castle wall...

I CHANNELED CERSEI
Only one arm available as the other is holding in the earpiece for the audio tour. I am not losing my guide, Darko...this climb involves removing my hearing aid to hear our guide and thereby creating an oxymoronic situation...hearing aid helps me hear...removal lessens my acuity...insertion of hearing pod gives me the tour talk 
At a landing midway up, I announce I have acrophobia...directed at one particularly floppy space-hogging person...possibly she thinks it a disease...she hangs back ...she who wears heels on a tour of city walls...


TYRION STOOD HERE


And don’t get me started on the couples who have to hold hands walking up...thereby using all the horizontal space...Cersei comes out again. I glare...
I tell a fellow climber of my height fear, I am not sure if he understands English...He nods and seems sympathetic and I stay near him all the way...
 FROM THE TOP JOFFREY LOOKED DOWN ON THE CROWD

I took this following photo by holding up my iPhone, eyes closed, 
Trusting in Apple technology
 my aim
  balance 
honed in yoga class

did not fall once on the City Walls tour
Not over cobblestones
 uneven grates
craterous holes
windingly
 dizzying
 stairs with
too tiny steps for modern feet
KINGS LANDING, DUBROVNIK, CROATIA




I did it.
still half way up
thank you Carol for taking this shot

 there are episodes in GoT where Arya Stark is training as an assassin and is asked who she is repeatedly
her answer must be

a girl has no name
why?
'A girl is no one. Being "no one" simply means that you no longer fear death. ... If a girl is truly no one, she has nothing to fear. That line earlier this season wasn't saying that "no one" could drink from the well without it causing harm'

when we gather at the bus depot to return to the ship, the man to whom I had whispered my fear...asked how I felt...he had understood...I reply "proud"
He then said "the girl has a name, conqueror of heights" 
 I am moved


photo on left
 climbed the tower on the upper right
where Cersei, Sansa, Joffrey, Jaime
Arya, Tyrion, Jon Snow and more
                                   hung out at various times                                              
I am pointing to my tattoo
and standing over Blackwater Bay 
feeling on top of the world


next episode
how the boys fared without me

woof, woof

Sunday, September 22, 2019

Girl Gone to Greece


LIAM AMONG GREEK PILLOWS AND TILES
I knew about the world early on because my father subscribed to National Geographic. Additionally my Dad worked for TWA ( Trans World Airlines for Gen Z) which meant we flew for free. We lived in a city housing project, did not own a car and both my parents worked to support us. But I had been to Europe way before any of my friends. 
There are places I still have to see. And I will be seeing them in October
The place I have most wanted to visit is Greece
 for ages
I am going
a brief summary

this will help


Trip Wednesday 10/2/19 -Wednesday 10/16/19

leave 10/2 fly Emirates to Milan
10/3-10/4... 2 nights in Milan
10/5 train to Venice...Venice Tour...stay overnight...
our Greek Cruise departs from Venice
10/6-10/13 our NCL (Norwegian Star) ship stops in 10/7 Kotor Montenegro...excursion Kayaking and village tour
10/8 arrive Corfu Greece...excursion villages and scenic drive
10/9 arrive  Kefalonia, Greece...Caves
10/10 arrive Santorini, Greece...Oia Village
10/11 at sea
10/12 arrive Dubrovnik, Croatia and excursion to King's Landing, Game Of Thrones
10/13 return to Venice
 and take train back to Milan in the afternoon
staying in Milan 10/13-10/16
10/14 day trip to Lake Como
10/15 Milan touring Day
The Last Supper viewing
Starbucks-its best in the world
Vertical Forest
10/16-fly Milan to JFK

and now some preview snapshots of our trip
see link following for story of the most incredible Starbucks in the world
located in Milan opened 2018
Liam loves the new pumpkin nitro brew 
he won't be present but I will tell him of it 




and our Greek excursions
 Greece


and more in Italy
George Clooney's place


Montenegro


Dubrovnik, Croatia
where I get to sit on The Iron Throne and stand at the top of King's landing and shout Dracarys
I spoke of my commitment to GoT in my last blog










The boys stay home
Paul is currently not in travel mode and Liam is a dog

My mother Ruth (Ruthless) often traveled alone
meeting friends in Spain and other parts of the world as well as parts of our country or meeting no one at all
she did it well into her eighties
people wanted to accompany her... she declined
she loved solo
do I have that DNA?









I don't want to travel totally alone
I am invited
 am accepted
thank you friends




I have a fave dress...I did not realize why it is a fave
I knew it reminded me of something pleasant
oh
 the Greek Flag
not bringing it
too obvious

Woof, Woof
ciao
opa
Doviđenja
Ćao