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| SEARCHING |
I am impatient; shaking my head about those bewildered lost folks who are calling, texting, frantically running to make it to an event...it is impossible to get lost nowadays. Really it is.
Except I do. Often. And I had a whopper lost episode last Saturday. We have a sisters-in-law lunch at Seasons 52, a high end restaurant ostensibly in Roosevelt Field. Check it out, link follows
https://www.seasons52.com/
I am prepared. I have the event date on my iPhone calendar which includes a link and directions and a map. I have the Open Table invite email. I know my route. The trip is supposed to take 15-19 minutes depending on traffic. I allow 45...this will enlarge my arrival window enough to avoid any possibility of lateness or lostness. I have a map propagated from the link. The screen shot of it below does not seem correct. The pin is plunked down on a Subway. Maybe Seasons 52 is also the name of a sandwich.
The second map below shows Seasons 52 next to the Grand Lux cafe. I have this from a Google map app on my phone. Hmm. This discrepancy does not affect my confidence in finding it. I figure I will easily locate it once there.
I have the directions (see screen shot below) and I follow the suggested route. I turn right once. I disregard the instructions after the fourth line. I begin the descent into LOST.
I enter the parking maze.
Cars are traveling unlawfully and recklessly. You see, it has snowed (as usual) and there are soft slushy areas as well as granite hard dirt and pebble encrusted snow mountains. These conditions reduce the number of spots. I have a car not a SUV so after a few go rounds I am able to insert it into a half spot; the front of which harbors a small iceberg. Being small and flanked by a huge van, I do not stick out too much. I take it.
Saturday at Roosevelt Field is nightmarish to me. I try to always shop online to avoid going near a mall. Yet, here I am on Saturday at Roosevelt Field. And it is a Saturday after a brutal winter and on the first full day of spring. Eager groups of shoppers careen into me. They unknowingly whack me with their packages. Folks do not realize how much wider they are with their purchases hanging from them.
Years ago I was able to negotiate visits to the mall. I had a plan. I would park up top and descend via an escalator. I experienced little human contact. Was in and out. Efficient. Pleasing. I now rarely go to the mall. I am out of practice by at least a decade.
https://www.seasons52.com/
I am prepared. I have the event date on my iPhone calendar which includes a link and directions and a map. I have the Open Table invite email. I know my route. The trip is supposed to take 15-19 minutes depending on traffic. I allow 45...this will enlarge my arrival window enough to avoid any possibility of lateness or lostness. I have a map propagated from the link. The screen shot of it below does not seem correct. The pin is plunked down on a Subway. Maybe Seasons 52 is also the name of a sandwich.
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| THE ROAD NOT TRAVELED |
Cars are traveling unlawfully and recklessly. You see, it has snowed (as usual) and there are soft slushy areas as well as granite hard dirt and pebble encrusted snow mountains. These conditions reduce the number of spots. I have a car not a SUV so after a few go rounds I am able to insert it into a half spot; the front of which harbors a small iceberg. Being small and flanked by a huge van, I do not stick out too much. I take it.
Saturday at Roosevelt Field is nightmarish to me. I try to always shop online to avoid going near a mall. Yet, here I am on Saturday at Roosevelt Field. And it is a Saturday after a brutal winter and on the first full day of spring. Eager groups of shoppers careen into me. They unknowingly whack me with their packages. Folks do not realize how much wider they are with their purchases hanging from them.
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| IS THERE A VIRTUAL PLAYGROUP? |
Where is the restaurant?
Its address is 630 Old Country Road. Of course it is nowhere near Old Country Road. I know this because I came down Old Country Road. I see Dick's Sporting Goods and its address is 600. Okay, Seasons 52 must be nearby. I still don't see it. I feel panic washing over me. I retrieve my phone, tap my contacts. The alphabetical order dictates which sister-in-law gets the first distress call. No answer. I leave a message. As I talk I hear myself becoming unraveled. I might have even denounced Saturday shopping at Roosevelt Field as well the mall venue concept. I sort of remember adding that I might go home. Really. I think I did. I walk for another 10 minutes. Why can I not see it? Proceeding in alphabetical order in my contacts, I phone the next sister-in-law...call does not seem to connect. Irony. I am a person who never makes calls and I have made two. I decide to enter the mall and find a directory. No entrances. How do I get in? Through Penney's? Through Dick's Sporting Goods? I walk and walk. My window of being early is rapidly closing. It is now 12:50 and the reservation is at 1PM. I am irrationally terrified of being late and phobic about being last. Last and on time is disturbing for me. Lost and Late is a condition that engenders a profound negative shift in my view of myself.
Way down on the side I find an entrance and go in. Oh no, this is not better. Swarming shoppers. A cacophony assaults my ears and I consider removing my hearing aids fearing I might lose more hearing. No sense of urgency exhibited by the crowd, they are strolling. But I need to move quickly. Time is running out.
No directory, not a one.
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| WHERE IS IT? |
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| HOW DO I GET IN? |
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| WHICH WAY? |
I ask directions of a salesman. He is stationed at a kiosk. Never heard of Seasons 52. He is sorry. I head down the other side. Cognizant that I look crazed. My anxious demeanor contrasts with the desultory movement of the groups of shoppers. I have my phone out and am using the GPS. It shows I am 5 minutes from Seasons 52. I have been 5 minutes away at every point since I parked my car.
I enter a posh jewelry store thinking these folks will know of a non-Food Court restaurant. They don't. And they are also sorry. Me too. I am very sorry. I know I have to get out of the mall. Seasons 52 must not be in the mall! Where is it? No exit. I must enter a store to escape. I race toward Macy's. I have traveled the length of the mall, both sides. I have to go through Macy's to get out. I do.
I see a Macy's guard as I am exiting. I ask him if he knows of Seasons 52. He says "I think it is on the outside." My aha moment. Of course it is. All the good restaurants are. And that is why it has an address. Why would restaurant in a mall need an address? Only outside restaurants need an address. Sigh. I am now out in the parking lot. Alone. Silence
Now I will be able to walk the perimeter and find Seasons 52. Not so fast. The entire facade is under construction. No signs visible, only scaffolding. I make a third call to my next in line sister-in-law. Success. An answer and directions. I have made 3 personal phone calls in one day. A record. One I hope to never break. I now am going to be a few minutes late as well as last. But not left out which is my worst fear. I arrive at 1:05. Late and Last but not Lost and Left out.
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| ALONE IN A CROWD |
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Questions
Why did I enter the mall?
Why didn't I follow the instructions?
Why didn't I turn on my phone while driving and listen to the GPS?
Why didn't I call the restaurant?
Why did I walk left and not right?
Why didn't I use my "lost" time wisely and buy shoes on my way through Macy's? Or at least accept the ubiquitous offers of free sprays of perfume?
Why didn't I use my "lost" time wisely and buy shoes on my way through Macy's? Or at least accept the ubiquitous offers of free sprays of perfume?
Why do have all these issues?
I think it is some sort of psychotic episode brought on by my Saturday mall fear and fueled by my regular "l" issues...lose, last, late, left out.
My favorite TV show of all time is Lost. See link for a refresher. It ended 5 years ago. May 2010.
No one was ever as lost as those folks. In June 2010, I bought a Ford Focus. I named him, Sawyer, after my favorite Lost character James "Sawyer" Ford. Here he is:
http://lostpedia.wikia.com/wiki/James_%22Sawyer%22_Ford
Maybe I am trying to channel the Losties' experience.
http://lostpedia.wikia.com/wiki/James_%22Sawyer%22_Ford
Maybe I am trying to channel the Losties' experience.
In the end they all found one another. It took a while (some were lost for eons) but they did.
And so did I.
Exiting the mall area is accomplished swiftly.
Once home, I perform a hard reboot to put myself back on a rational track. This "restart" consists of a visit to the health club. I walk on the treadmill and read. Walking and reading transport me to another zone. Exhaust the body, focus the mind and override emotions.
Later that evening I complete the reboot with some red wine.
Brain rewired. All is okay.
Who was that "lost, late, last person? Not me. How in the world do people get lost? Seriously...there are devices...
Safe at home again.
Exiting the mall area is accomplished swiftly.
Once home, I perform a hard reboot to put myself back on a rational track. This "restart" consists of a visit to the health club. I walk on the treadmill and read. Walking and reading transport me to another zone. Exhaust the body, focus the mind and override emotions.
Later that evening I complete the reboot with some red wine.
Brain rewired. All is okay.
Who was that "lost, late, last person? Not me. How in the world do people get lost? Seriously...there are devices...
Safe at home again.
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Woof, Woof
